Weaving Dreams...

Hey everyone,
Just finished the fourth and final day of Dreamweaver camp. Lots of fun. It was pretty basic. I could've learned a lot more in four 1.5 hour sessions, but the workshop was full of a bunch of "those" people. You know the ones. They're exceptionally smart except when it comes to computers... then suddenly they don't know their ass from their elbow. There were, like, calculus and chemistry professors in the workshop, and yet... "Wait, so where is the server, exactly?" and "How do I copy those files again?" Aaarrgh!! Computers are complicated. They are not mystical. Why do so many people have mental blocks about basic computer functions?
If you'd like to see the results of my labor, check out my new Professor West's Website. Not bad for 6 hours of work, eh? I'll try to redo my portfolio site soon, but my friend Lea was going to redo it for me and then she went to Prague, so I don't know if she's going to continue it or not.

In other news... I had two drags off a cigarette on Saturday night. I then gave it away willingly, completely unimpressed. Now, this does not mean that I don't constantly want to smoke, but I have discovered that I have plenty of resistance when actually faced with it. I could have smoked that entire cigarette, but didn't want to.
Disregarding those two drags... tomorrow equals one month. I've even been off the patch for nearly a week.

Is this serious?

Three weeks. Today makes three weeks without smoking. As a reward, Sci-Fi Channel has decided to air Firefly, starting tonight. As an added bonus, they're showing a new episode of BSG. See... Sci-Fi channel cares about my health. They're proud of me. They are rewarding me for my discipline and dedication. They love me.

If anyone else wants to send gifts, they'll be welcome, but don't feel like you should. Sci-Fi Channel's got you covered.

And in case anyone's wondering, that three weeks is without cheating. Not even a drag. Not that this is easy, but I'm kicking ass.

Two Weeks... Twooooo Weeeeeeksssssuh

Anyone get the movie reference? Granted it doesn't work as well written as spoken, but my head doesn't split apart and turn into a bomb anyway, so I guess it doesn't really matter.

Anyway, it's been two weeks now. I haven't even cheated. Primarily because no one up here smokes, or they're really good friends and won't let me have one. Otherwise I would've cheated! No shame in my game... I want a cigarette bad! It's not bad enough that I'll go buy a pack (although I consider that about once an hour), but it's bad enough that if someone gave me a cigarette, I'd smoke it. Good thing I don't buy the whole "sins of the heart" thing, because my heart is LUSTING for tabacky. But I have not sinned with my body.

So the other thing going on is that I'm having a sort of obsession with a song. "Everyone is Changing" by Keane. I don't know why, but I can't stop listening to this song. I have the CD in my car, and I try to listen to the rest of the CD, but it's weird, because in between each other song I have to listen to Track 6 again. I think about this song day and night; I get this strange glaze over my mind whenever I hear it. It's almost like I go into a trance or something. When I hear it, I feel like I'm living in some strange alternate reality where everything else slows down and becomes more significant and hyper-real. I can't explain it, but this song possesses my very soul. PS: I now know how loud my car stereo goes, and if you've never had your car on maximum driving down the highway at 74 mph with the sunroof and all the windows open with this song on, you've not truly felt the depth of emotion.

Or maybe I'm just freaking out because I want a cigarette so bad.

Dennis Blows, I Don't Suck

So, first of all, my sympathies to anyone who was hurt or suffered negatively from the Hurricane Dennis thing. That being said, however... when do we stop treating Hurricane Devastation in Florida as though it were something special. Do I expect sympathy for a foot of snow? No, because it happens so often, everyone knows better. There's no sympathy for a level 4 in Oklahoma, because anyone there should know better than to say "WHY ME?" Why you? Because you live in goddamned toronado alley! So, Florida... sucky day, kids, but, you can't say last year didn't give you an idea. So build stronger houses, or move. Emily's on her way.

In other WTF News: it has now been 9 full days since I have had a cigarette. As if that isn't amazing enough, yesterday, I (ready for this?) forgot to put on a new patch, and it was actually fine. I'm now wondering if I'll be okay just quitting the patch now. I don't know if I'll try that or not, though. I just don't want this time to be another false start.

The worst part is the habit. I just feel like there's this thing that I'm supposed to be doing, and just can't. It's really strange because it's this thing that I've done about once an hour or more, every day, for the last ten years.

Another thing that's bugging me as I'm awake at a rare (for the summer) 7:00 A.M.-- It's so annoying when the local weather guy says "Thanks, Al," and "Back to you, Al," when Roker hands over to the local weather report. Does he really think anyone believes that he and Al are good friends, or even in contact? Why can't he say "Good morning," or "Back to Al." We all know that Al Roker has no fre--WOW, Sgt Scott Haines of the Santa Rosa Florida County Sherriff, is HOT!!!--sorry... has no freaking clue who Rich Caniglia of Rochester's WHEC is, and that they're not in personal communication while doing the weather.

Well, that's what's got me going this morning.

Cool!

Directed Energy Weapons?? Star Trek gets closer every day... Now if we could get our society to progress as quickly as our technology.

Gonna be a bumpy ride

Hi, long time no post. Yeah, yeah, I know. I suck.

Watching Lewis Black on TV right now, while biting on a pen that has the ends taken out and the ink and ballpoint removed.

Why, you ask?

Because I'm working VERY VERY VERY VERY hard at not smoking.

For those of you who read this, please don't tell other people that know me. I'm trying not to let anyone around me know for a while until I can get things a little under control. I'm on the patch, drinking lots of water, working out with Galad on FitTV. I've been pretty good about not eating constantly, too. Day One is almost over. I took a sleeping pill to help me go to sleep.

This blog may soon become a Quitting Smoking Journal of some sort. Maybe I'll just write something on here whenver I get the urge. Or maybe it'll be another month before I put something else on here. Who knows.

Man, Lewis Black is funny.